Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Become an Inverse Paranoid (Fundamentals of Success #6)

I must admit that this month has been particularly hard for me. My hubby has just set up his own business and like any new endeavor, it requires A LOT of patience before it can lift off the ground... patience which I'm afraid I didn't have especially when due dates of bills are coming up and the amount of money coming in is lesser than the amount of money going out. In short, I was in a state of panic and fear was creeping in. Out of fear, I decided to apply for a regular office job even if my heart wasn't really in it. I was crushed when I didn't even get a call back and I started to lose confidence in myself.

Then I remembered this success principle by Jack Canfield --- Become an inverse paranoid. I should operate as if everyone is part of plot to enhance my well-being. The moment I accepted and applied this success principle, things started falling into place once again. Because I changed my paradigm, I stopped feeling hopeless; I stopped doing things that weren't really making me happy; I made time for meditation; I started feeling fearless and happy again.

Now, I thank God for that office job that didn't push thru. I believe that it happened so that I can make room for four more jobs that came my way which I can do at the comforts of our home without changing the current lifestyle and schedule that I have been so comfortable with for three years now.

Like what Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, said:
"Every negative event contains within it the seed of an equal or greater benefit."

So whenever something happens, whether society deems it good or bad, I must believe that it happened for a greater purpose... that everyone around me is helping me get what I want in life, even if that means getting rejected sometimes.

"The trick is to realize that whatever you are going through now is going to turn out better in the future as well. Look for the lemonade in the lemons. The more you begin to look for the good, the sooner and more often you will find it. And if you take the attitude that it is coming, the less upset and discouraged you'll get while you're waiting for it."

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Believe in Yourself (Fundamentals of Success #5)

Best-selling author Max Lucado once said:

"You weren't an accident.You weren't mass produced.You aren't an assembly line product. You were deliberately planned, specifically gifted and lovingly positioned on Earth by the Master Craftsman."

Therefore, we have to make our lives count. Since we can only control three things in our life -- our thoughts, our visions and our actions -- we have to use them positively by continuously believing in our self, our dreams, our hopes even if no one else does.

It's a matter of attitude and we always have a choice. We can choose to believe or not to believe. Since it's the latter one that brings in more blessings and great things, why choose otherwise, right? Don't waste your life saying or believing you can't. Stop minding what others think of you. It's none of your business anyway so just go ahead and focus on the things that you can and want to do.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

How to beat Stress? Pinpoint your stressors.

As the old saying goes, "knowing is half the battle", and indeed, it is true, including when trying to beat stress in your daily life. Stress is normal. It happens to everyone, even to the most saintly person in this whole world. After all, stress is really a God-given / natural response that triggers our body to fight or flight. At the most basic level, stress can spur us to act when there is an emergency or when our life is put at risk.

However, when stress lingers or gets triggered even by the smallest or the most mundane of things, then stress itself could be a danger to us. In the long run, it can cause severe illnesses like heart attack, migraine, high blood pressure, even the common cold. It can rob you of your creativity, make you forgetful and disorganized, and simply make your life miserable. When stress becomes like this in your life, it's time to take action and beat it. But how?

One way to beat stress is to know where it's coming from. Are you stressed out when you're procrastinating? Is stress a result of your being unemployed, or having an unresolved conflict with someone, or being disorganized, or from being obsessive-compulsive or a perfectionist? Is your dead-end job stressing you out? Is it your parents? Your in-laws? Your friends? Your social network? Whatever the source of your stress is, you have to be able to pinpoint it out so you can start thinking of a solution for it.

As for me, lately, I have been stressed about my upcoming trip to Cagayan de Oro. It's all those ugly memories I've had with my grandparents that are coming to the surface and stressing me out. They've hurt me so much in the past that even if I've already forgiven them, I just can never forget. My solution? I now adapt a little paradigm shift by looking at the fact that my grandfather is almost 90 years old and that he needs to be with his grandchildren now more than ever, before it's too late. I am also looking at this trip as an opportunity to travel with my parents which we haven't done in a very long time. And lastly, I will have a chance to see my bestest friend, Mer, as well as my other high school friends should time permit it.

If I wasn't able to pinpoint where my jittery feelings, anxiety and stress are all coming from these past few days, I'd probably be having a sour mood everyday and my husband would likely be the recipient of my bad behavior. Now that I know where they're coming from, I am able to control my emotions and separate them from what is real and happening right now.

So try this technique. Pinpoint your stressors and beat stress now.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

CALMNESS - A Paragram by Paramahansa Yogananda

My world seemed kind of "noisy" recently... or at best, it's not as peaceful as I willed it to be in the past. A family member has been staying with us for more or less two weeks now and though a big part of me is happy to be with this person again, her being strong-willed, opinionated and feisty are somewhat draining the lights out of me. Her life decisions made me question my own; her material wealth (like those branded bags she has) made me discontent; basically her presence made mine feel obsolete (like the way I dress myself although I know what she meant). I felt like I want what she has... it made me think for a while that her life was better than mine. I am normally not like this. I easily get happy for other people's blessings and happiness and I normally don't compare myself or my home life to others because truth be told, I am weird and there are not a lot of people who understand my chosen lifestyle. I've already come to accept that. But when my life and my decisions get questioned or challenged, especially by someone I hold dear, little doubts here and there get planted and before I know it, I am a one big ball of mess.

But before I even get to that messy part, I am once again seeking peace from all this noise in my head and around me. I turn to my Para-Grams. And so I drew the card that talks about being calm:
Knowing that you are a child of God, make up your mind to be calm no matter what happens. If your mind is fully identified with your activities, you cannot be conscious of the Lord. But if you are calm and receptive to him within while being active without, you are rightly active. Each time a swarm of worries invades your mind, refuse to be affected; wait calmly while seeking the remedy. Spray the worries with the powerful chemical of your peace. You cannot buy peace; you must know how to manufacture it within, in the stillness of your daily practices in meditation. When you think that you have reached the utmost depth of silence and calmness, go deeper still. In the silence you will receive from God the answers to your life's problems.
I like that part where it says I must manufacture my peace within. That particular day when I felt so troubled, as if I woke up on the wrong side of the bed and everything I did just ended in failure, I stopped, closed my eyes and meditated. I quieted my mind and my heart. It was difficult especially with all the self-doubts swimming in my head and in my heart. It took a long while too and realized that I missed it.

With the busyness of my life, I wasn't able to meditate as frequently and as regularly as I did in the past. No wonder I was easily swayed, my emotions were easily stirred and it seemed like I couldn't find my inner voice. I now refuse to be affected by this noise and I promise to continue to live by my own rules of happiness. It's how God made me and I do believe that I should honor that, and not be someone else that I am not.

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